(upbeat dance music)
(audience cheering) (audience chanting) We’re back. It’s time for Ask Wendy. Everybody have a seat. Except for you, come on over. Aha.
Hi, Wendy. How you doin’?
How you doin’? Who are you, where are you from? I’m Lola from Brooklyn, New York. Okay, what do you do? I’m in the Foreign Service. Oh, good for you.
Yes. So now, how can we help? So I’m single in New York City. I’ve been single for about five years. I’d like to get married in the near-ish future. My issue is that I’ve always felt that a guy with kids is a deal-breaker, but I’m now at that age where most guys will have kids. So do I stay sadly single, or do I lower my standards? (everyone laughing) Shout out to all the men with kids.
No offense, no offense. Wow. Well how old are you? I’m 36. (audience groaning)
Well you’re being unrealistic.
Yes, I know. I know.
Yeah. You know, I always say, I’ve been consistent with this, the cutoff mark for dating men with kids is 30. If you’re a 30 year old woman and you’re still dating, open your mind to one. And if it’s two, it’s gotta be by the same woman. (audience laughing)
You’re not ready to get that sloppy that fast. Do you know what I’m saying? Yeah.
Because you’ve saved yours, you don’t have children, do you? No, no.
Okay. And you’re 36. Mhm.
So she’s coming with no children. I think one is fair. Two, if by the same woman.
Okay. Okay. (audience clapping)
Thank you. Okay? Thank you.
You’re very welcome. Come on. Hi Wendy.
How you doin’? How you doin’?
Fine thanks. My name is Morgan, I’m from Charlotte, North Carolina. And me and my fiance have been together nine years. We have two children, and he promised me he’d get a vasectomy after our second child, who he is almost three. So I’ve been withholding sex. What should I do (audience chattering)
to get him to get snipped so that I don’t have to get on birth control? Okay. I hear wrap it over my shoulder, (audience laughing)
but that’s not what I’m going to say to you, I have questions first. Yes.
So how old are you, Morgan? 40.
Okay, you’re 40 years old, you’ve been with him for nine years. Yes.
You have two children, how old are your kids? My girl’s seven, Aida, and Samson is two and a half. Two and a half. And you wanted a third child. No, I do not.
I mean, you do not. No.
And he’s not gotten the vasectomy, but he also hasn’t gotten married. How long have you been engaged? Eight years. (audience laughing)
Eight years. It’s a mutual choice that we’re both not, we’re lifelong committed partners. Okay, but it could be that that commitment is reason that he’s not getting a vasectomy, because he hasn’t, and you also haven’t married him. I mean, you haven’t pushed it, and he hasn’t pushed it. Maybe he’s thinking that if by chance it doesn’t work out with you, he can go to another woman (audience chattering)
and make a new family. (Morgan groans)
You know, that’s the real reality of the situation, you know what I mean?
Mhm. I’m not saying he doesn’t love you. Oh, yeah.
Or that he’s not in love with you. But to me, clap if you think that. (audience clapping)
Okay. So I need to marry him and then he’ll get a vasectomy. I don’t know, the idea that he’s waited this, that you all have waited this long– It’s crazy!
Maybe you don’t need to get married. Maybe there’s a reason behind it. And as far as vasectomy, so what do you sneak and take birth control? No, I withhold. Okay.
(audience gasping) When’s the last time you had sex, Morgan? Well I may have drank a little bit a couple of weeks ago. (audience chattering)
Okay, a couple of weeks. That game’s not gonna work though, you guys have to have a conversation. Yes.
This is over my head. Yes.
You know what I mean? Mhm. Good luck on all accounts.
(audience laughing) Thank you, Wendy.
Alright. More Ask Wendy is next. (audience chanting)
We’re back with more Ask Wendy. Make yourselves at home. Come along, how you doin’? How you doin’? You havin’ a good time? Awesome time, thank you so much! You’re welcome.
(audience laughing) What’s your name, where are you from? Hi Wendy, how you doin’? How you doin’?
(audience laughing) I’m Theo, I’m from Baltimore, Maryland. (Theo and audience cheering)
Hi, Theo! Alright, what could be the problem? (laughs) So I’ve been dating a great, great guy so far. I’m a bit of a introvert, and we met online. Really? (Theo and audience laughing) (Wendy laughs) I know, I’m a fake introvert. Either way, he’s amazing, but at the same time he’s a little bit thirsty, and because I’m a bit of a introvert, he almost asks me out every day. So how do I ask him to ease up a bit without discouraging him from pursuing me? Is he a red flag, or is he too thirsty? What do you think? Well, okay. How old are you? I’m 35. People hate when I ask that question, but age is relative to every situation. How long have you been dating him? Only four months. Four months.
Yes. Do you date other guys also? Er.
(audience laughing) No, it’s okay. I’m trying to establish his importance in your life.
Yes. And it’s not a big deal. Yes.
Alright, how many other guys do you date? One other guy. One other guy. Do you sleep with the other guy? Okay, I don’t know. Okay.
(audience laughing) Have you slept with guy number one that was, Theo, focus.
Wow, you gotta– Have you slept with the first guy? Yes.
Okay. (audience laughing)
You’re a mature woman, you’re takin’ care of yourself. Yes.
Okay, and you’re sleeping with two guys at once. Yes, oh my God. (audience laughing) I’m sorry, momma. And one wants you be his full girlfriend? Maybe, if that’s what he’s, isn’t that what he’s doing by asking me almost every day?
Yes, he wants to be the one or he wants to be the one. He doesn’t know about the other guy, does he? No.
Yeah, exactly. It’s okay, it’s okay.
Congratulations. Everyone doesn’t have to know everything that’s going on in your life if you’re a single person. This is true. This is what I want you to do. Talk to this guy and let him know, and don’t call him thirsty or anything like that. You’re old enough to be able to let him down maturely, but this relationship must stop. And I’m gonna tell you why I’m breaking up another relationship. (audience chattering)
‘Cause he’s too invested, and you’re not, and that’s okay. Clap if you’re with me, co-hosts. (audience clapping)
Thank you, Wendy. That’s the mature thing to do. Have fun out there though, Theo! (upbeat dance music)