Today I want to introduce you to the
love bank. So I’m 41 years old and I’ve been
married for 17 years. My wife and I actually dated for six
years before that, so we’ve been together for 23 years.
I think one of the concepts about relationships that has helped us the
most is a concept called the love bank. And we learned about this when we were
either newlyweds or maybe even before we got married.
It’s been awhile, so I don’t remember.
But here’s what the love bank is. You have a bank inside you called the
love bank. And when people are kind to you,
when they treat you with respect, when they do nice things for you,
they make deposits in your love bank. And your love for them grows. So when your husband or wife makes
you dinner or takes you out to a movie or buys you something nice
or tells you you look good, they’re making deposits into your love bank. And when you do that for them,
you’re doing the same. And their love for you grows.
But if you’re critical of them. If you’re mean to them.
If you ignore them. If you spend more time with other people
than you do with them, you are making withdrawals in their love bank. And the reason relationships fail is
because one or both parties in the relationship make more withdrawals than
they do deposits. And you know what happens if you make
too many withdrawals from the bank. Your account goes negative.
And that’s when relationships start to break down is when you have one or two
people in a relationship who both have a negative account balance in their love bank. And so this concept has just helped me
so much, and my wife as well,
to always be thinking about how can I make deposits in my wife’s love bank? One thing that I do for my wife every day, is I tell her I love her every day.
I hug her every day. And I serve her.
I do the dishes every night after dinner and lots of other things.
But I have developed sort of a routine and a habit of I’ve figured out what my
wife loves and I try to actively do those things.
And I’m not saying I don’t make withdrawals because I know I do.
But after 17 years of marriage, being happily married,
I can say I’ve definitely made way more deposits than withdrawals.
So just take this love bank concept and apply it to your own life.
And think about how can I make more deposits of love into,
not just your partner or your husband or wife, but even to your friends, your family members,
people you care about. Make deposits into their love bank and
watch their love for you grow.