Having Children out of Wedlock is not a "FAD"!!



hello mr. sweet June 2010 kind of sad no sad right now because from just found out about Bobby crystianna Brown passed away um was really really praying that she would pull through she would make it you know when he thought it just found up as she passed and just want to say um may God Jehovah God be with the family right now may he be with her father Bobby you know just was really praying a lot of millions of other people that she would pull through you know hoping and praying that she's gonna make it but um she didn't make it Lisa this way she don't have to suffer anymore you know she was really devastated after her mom passed with me you know they were so close she was proposed devastated I honestly don't think this she took a warm when I put out her mom so I mean they were just that close so I was just thinking over God to be with their family right now there's time it's so sad because I was really praying really praying really hard that she would pull through she would make it you know she's such a she was such a young lady and she was so young only 23 years old so she was just so young and so sad that she had to leave this world to say my way her mom did you know just really sad meant a lot for work on that but anybody ever felt hopeful Jehovah God be with the family right now but um anyway that's not what I'm what my videos about I just actually read that before I I was going to do the video and I was actually read that before I started taping so but I want to talk about though is having children out of wedlock single motherhood I don't want to keep beating a dead horse you know I know I did some other videos talking about it but I guess I might well my point is is that I want to get crawl across to the young lady my goal is to get my point across to the young lady that um they should wait you know babies can wait you know they can wait through the proper time they can wait until you get married they can wait till you grow and get to a mature more mature age they can wait until you're more financially stable to take care of the child and you have someone that will help you provide for a child and you can ensure that that child grows up in a two-parent home almost no gay everybody knows there's no guarantees but there's nothing is guaranteed in this life but um you know you have a better guarantee than just popping them out out of wedlock just any kind of way so I just want to get the point across like it just seems like you know I don't know what the mentality of these young ladies are I don't know what their mentality is it just seems to me that they think it's some kind of a fad and that's the point that's the point that I want to make that it just seems like they think kind of a fad that childrens had babies out of wedlock and not kind of not having any kind of financial plan or not have any prospects for a husband to help support the child supporting a child is not just about supporting that child financially but supporting that child emotionally physically and mentally and spiritually and unless you're prepared to do that it's not a good idea to have a child out of wedlock and you know of course I said in my you know some of my earlier videos that you know I had two children out of wedlock and I've been struggling for many many many years trying to take care of my two son and I'm still struggling and it's hard if you have to be a very very strong person to be a single mom and some I'm finding that somebody younger generations of women coming up now don't seem to have the endurance don't seem to have the strength the mental strength or even spiritual strength to raise children on your own because you don't you need both of those you need mental strength and you need spiritual strength to raise children on your own it is a it is a tremendous responsibility and I'm seeing that somebody young ladies now don't seem to have that strength you don't seem too happy no I just read a headline the other day about this teenage girl had her baby and she dumped a baby put the baby in the dumpster and the baby the baby they killed the baby because she was afraid of what her family would think you know you didn't stop to think that this was a life this was like I couldn't even I can't wrap my mind around that I can't even imagine doing something like that you know I'm a worrywart I'll type person I'm a worrywart so there is no way I can do something like that and I have a conscious I think that when God was not consciousness I think he gave me minds and a couple other people so it's like I have too much of a content I have too much of a big heart I'm too much of a worrywart to even imagine doing something like that you know I couldn't even wrap my mind around him and Plus on top of that I love little babies so I just could not even imagine I can't wrap my mind around somebody even doing I just can't wrap my mind around that I mean who does that I mean what is the mentality of that what goes through your mind before you put in you before you put your baby in a dumpster I mean what's running through your head you know I mean I don't get it I just don't get it you know but a lot I'm seeing I'm noticing that a lot of the younger made or not don't have the stamina the mental stamina on the mental strength that it takes to raise children on your own you have to have a tremendous amount of stress to raise children on your own it is a very complicated job it's hard when it's two people raising children when you have a husband and a wife in the home raising children it's a difficult job with two parent required with two parent so just imagine being one parent trying to raise the child and um you have to have a lot of spiritual strength you have to have a lot of mental strength it takes a lot of mental and spiritual endurance to raise children on your own and I'm noticing a lot of the young ladies don't have that and they're taking easy weighing down um but the ones that are having the children some of our some of them are neglecting the children and um you know and the poor children have to suffer and I like I said I don't know it would I don't know like I said it's some type of a fad that a nun noticing young ladies are they're having these babies and they're having them by different fathers I'm not judging you know I don't have the right to judge because both of my children don't have the same father I'm just trying to make a point um it just seems like they just don't have any kind of forethought after you know I mean they don't seem to be learning you know for the first time or the second time or whatever they don't seem to be learning and I just you know I don't know I'm trying to figure out what the mentality is if they think it's some type of a fad or they think this is the thing to do is to have all these kids out of wedlock I don't know what they think I don't know if they think that you know that they're going to get all this government assistance and you know because you know the government is flighty as I said in some of my earlier videos the government is sliding one day you got something the next day you might not have it you know one day you got your stamps or you're getting a certain amount of stamps next time you look up they cutting making cuts you know the government has cut over a billion dollars in food stamps not people don't know that government they have been over a billion dollars in food stamps and so the government is it's very exciting I wouldn't this this is not the time to rely on the government I wouldn't advise anybody the only person that – there's two people that you can rely on and that's Jehovah God and yourself those the only two people that you can rely on and in this system you got you cannot rely on the government cannot rely on the government the government is too flighty and now Obama only has one more year in office and um he's gonna be out you screams coming out one more year to go and he's going to be out so um after that we don't know who we gonna get in there after that after that we don't know what's going to happen we don't know if they're going to cut they're gonna be start making some deeper cut like you just don't know and so that's you can't rely on the government and I can't express that more I can't stress that I can't stress that more you cannot rely on the government you know because the government is too flighty and so but I think that's what a lot of these young ladies are doing they're they're putting all this dependence in the government they're relying on the government and you know they're thinking the government is going to you know they're going to be able to get extra the more children that they have they're going to get extra assistance I don't know I don't know that's the mentality or you know they think it's getting more child support perhaps I don't know I'm just trying to figure all this out you know what is the mentality behind having all these children out of wedlock because all I see all that the only thing I've seen is struggle all I see is struggle that's all you're going to do is you're going to struggle and that's all actually because that's all I've done and and I've I've done everything I went to school I went to college for many years you know and worked in addition to going to college and in addition to taking care of my thumb in addition to holding down the house and everything and paying the bills up in doing it all because my fall was not my mentality I guess I lose my can't understand it because I don't have that mentality you know my mentality was always trying to be like let let me try to get up out of this system you know let me let me get out of the cycle let me let me get out of the cycle of poverty let me try to pull myself up out of this you know let me try to do everything I can to be self-sufficient you know that has always been my mentality over the years and so that's of every that that everything that I tried to do was always reflective and you know and still is reflective of that so and I'm type of person you know I'm not a complacent I'm not a complacent person I'm not another person I can just I don't know you can just sit around and just collect a check or whatever like that I'm not like that you know I'm not a complacent person you know so it was just a prize this is just a pride when you know you get up and you go to work and you know you're paying your bills and you know you're least doing the best you can to pay them even if you're struggling you're doing the best you can to pay them and you know that you're working and you know you're doing the best you can to support your family there's a certain amount of pride that that takes place when that happened you know I don't see where you can have any pride being on assistants and collecting a check you know you know and not working and not even trying to do anything to support your family you know there's there's no where's the pride in that you know so I guess I just that's why I have a hard time understanding the understandings and mentality of these young ladies and and why they're all the babies you know I'm like I said I don't know if they think it's a fad you know they think it's the thing to do it cool or this is what what you do is you have children but I'm here to tell you right here right now it is not a fad having children out of wedlock particularly multiple children out of wedlock by different fathers it is not a fad it's not cool it's not a fad this is not a fad you know it's not and in it it's not it's not even moral not a moral thing to do it's not like I said once again I'm not judging you know I'm not judging I don't want people coming over here saying that I'm trying to judge I'm I don't know no I'm not I can't judge I'm not in a position to judge anyone but I'm just saying that I'm trying to make the point clear that it is not a fad it's not something it's not cute you know it's just not something to do you know you know you want to wait like I said in my other video you want to wait until you get a mane until you get a mane you know that you know unleash you pretty sure you know nothing 100% but you can give somebody that you know that in these has the intentions of halfway has the intention from staying in your corner helping you support these children you know like I said if nothing is guaranteed but I mean but there just to be popping them out and you know that you're not going to have that off off rip you know it doesn't you know it doesn't make any sense you know and they're not learning any and my thing is that I'm learning anything from the first in the second time you know after I had my youngest son I was like well let me go ahead and like it put it on lockdown and you know I got my tubes tied because you know I said you know I'm not going to keep putting myself in this position I'm not gonna keep putting myself in a position to I figured oh I'm on my own with these kids and I get left holding the bag so I'm not going to keep putting myself in this situation I'm not going to keep putting myself in the situation you know to be doing this you know I said I've already put myself in a position twice if I'm not gonna keep doing this so you know I told myself wise up smarten up smarten up June and I did i smartened up and I got my to sky and some people tried to talk me out of it and I was like I'm this is my decision and I knew that I you know I'm done you know I'm done I start new I'm done I said I'm not going to keep bringing children into the world and I can't support them and can't take care of them and I wonder and I want to have a husband to help me and and and and this is not the way to do it you know so you know I put it in and I and I wit I took it a step further after that I took it a step even further and later on I became some of it and so now I'm there so I I closed up shop altogether and I'm very proud of myself I'm very happy you know for spiritual reasons I want to serve God and you know just mm-hmm shutting it down I'm thinking but I'm not I'm not taking any chances I got to the point to where I was like I'm not taking any more chances I'm just not taking any more chances nothing's guaranteed you know birth control metrics fail even to get to see I failed so you know what I'm gonna I'm gonna shut it down I'm gonna shut it down for spiritual reasons before and for moral reasons but for that reason as well I said I'm just going to shut it down I'm not even gonna put myself and I mean I'm not even gonna even take the chance I'm getting myself in that situation again and so that's what I did you know because I said I I'm in this thing on my own and I said I'm not gonna keep doing this just cranky and so that's yeah I mean I would think that other young ladies would would come to that conclusion as well like you know okay I didn't make this mistake once or maybe twice – okay well they need let me I'm gonna learn from this and I'm Malheur from this was taking these mistakes and I'm not gonna keep doing this thing over and over and over so I was I was thinking enable Street how hard it is with the 1 & 2 and so you would think they would be like ok well I'm done I'm not gonna keep doing this not gonna keep it myself in the situation you know and I don't expect everybody to think like me but you know you would think that at some point that you know something would go off of a bell or something would go off in their head and be like you know okay oh yeah pretty much struggling with these kids but I have I can't take care of the ones I have so you know it just seems to be common sense common logic you know let me let me let me shut it down you know and a guy being not men aren't exactly beating down your door when you have kids outside of wedlock I'm going to come to do a video on that too but I'm when you have children out by the marriage and you're raising them your single parent you know men aren't exactly beating down your door wanting to date marry you you know I found that out too we did you know I was like I realized a few years ago that out now you know men ain't so pick two to jump on the bandwagon of having a relationship with you or marry you when you have children out of wedlock in almost lot of men don't even if they have kids themselves they don't want a woman that have kids they don't they don't they did they don't know if you got baby daddy drama they don't know you know they have an issue with it with raising someone else's kids you know it takes a special man I think it takes a special type of man to take on someone else's children you know another man's children I think it takes a special kind of guy you know and he had he had that man better have so much love to you he better love you so much you know and that's rare to find you can't find that you know you can't just go around the corner and find that you know that's very rare I mean if a single mother you find somebody like that girl you better hold on to him and not let him go but you can't hardly find up in my fam you know that we can't just find it around the corner I mean it's very very difficult to find someone that will take on you and your children even if you have one you know but your chances are better if you just have one because you just got one but then that at the same time they gotta know the situation no they gotta know Ewing I know baby daddy drama going on enough and do you know they got they're gonna ask questions they gotta know what your situation is even if you just got one uncle some men don't don't want nothing to do with women they have a lot of them don't want to do with women they have kids a whole lot of money I'm starting to realize that now that motor starting to realize that and so I was hoping that when my youngest was a baby that I'm I was gonna find someone nice and settle down you know and he could help me be a father figure to my children well it didn't go down like that so like I said most men do not want to take on the responsibility of someone kids and so when I would what I could see is like watching a train wreck I respect what you train wreck I see be generated it popping out these babies left and right and you know everything where they're trying to go and I know what the future looks like for them now there are exceptions every different section to every rule but in most cases most of the time a man don't want to take on women with which children by other men particularly if they're if they're by more than one man they don't you know they they looking at you like why you got why you've got three kids two or three different date then four different baby daddies what's going on with you that you have all these dating daddy and then they're looking at you like um well you got any baby daddy drama if some know men resent the fact that you're going after the man for child support you know which they have to they should be paying anyway well that's another vlog I'm not getting into that but some men have the issue with that it's a number of things that they have an issue in it you know I'm going to do a part two about this because I I want to go into um some of the things that I dealt with on my the man's relationship and I had I think I might do a part two on this three til 2010 stay tuned

Michael Martin

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