8 Signs Polyamory is for You

We live in a world where the idea of love
is fed by a “Happily Ever After”. Our perception of what should and should not
be is completely skewed by what we have learned in media. The typical pattern of intense passion and
emotions, a conflict that makes us fight for that God forsaken love and then the resolution
of being together forever. We see any romantic or sexual interests outside
of that relationship as immoral and that we must constrain ourselves for this one love
for the rest of our lives. But is there such a thing as your one and
only love? Is it not possible to love more than one soul? This question has resulted in cheating, divorce,
resentment, conflicts and a lot of lying. Is monogamy the only way to be in a loving
relationship? More and more people are finding healthy relationships
inside consensual, non-monogamous relationships. In actuality, the cultures that only accept
monogamous relationships are in the minority worldwide. According to a paper in the journal of evolutionary
biology, 83% of societies allow polygamy. At Psych2Go, we’re bringing you the “8 signs
polyamory may be right for you”. The first sign is that you have always felt
limited and confined in conventional relationships. It’s not the person you’re with that’s making
you feel confined, it’s the situation. Have you ever felt like you’re no longer acting
as an individual but always thinking about being faithful to your partner and you can’t
help but think; does this come from a place of love, freedom and security or does it come
from a place of ownership, jealousy and fear? Sign number two is that you learn so much
about yourself through others. Relationships are fun, yes, but they’re also
incredible opportunities to learn and explore different aspects of yourself. Each person is a universe and both negative
and positive experiences that we venture in with them are a journey to learning and growing
individually as a person. If you are limited to only one relationship,
there may be aspects of yourself you are neglecting. Sign number three is that you are the kind
of person who feels energized by other people. Does diving into experience with people outside
of your primary relationship, nurture, energize and refresh you? Do you feel energized and refreshed after
you have an innocent yet perhaps a little flirtatious coffee with someone from the opposite
sex whilst in a relationship? This does not have to imply any physical engagement;
an innocent lunch date is enough. In a polyamorous relationship, you are free
to flirt, have fun and share your experiences with other people in any way you desire. Sign four is that you like to constantly challenge
yourself in order to grow. The most common reason for people rejecting
an open relationship is jealousy. They would rather not deal with the intensity
of jealous feelings they would get with the very imagination of their partner engaging
with someone else. But what if polyamory will teach you to be
less jealous and to love with complete freedom, would this not be like taking an entire weight
off of your shoulders? This experience, while still being a very
difficult one will teach you to love someone. Fear, jealousy and possession are not things
that come from a place of love. Consider it a love boot camp. Sign number five is that communication and
honesty are very important things for you. You can’t stand lying about anything and let’s
be honest, most people feel safer not admitting to their partners that they may be interested
in or attracted to someone else. They may also not feel safe about telling
their partner about certain friendships for fear of jealousy. You are the kind of person who would rather
be open about these difficult topics and feel safe in approaching them with your partner. You think it’s best and healthier to tackle
the situation and finding a compromise that makes you both happy. If there is something forbidden to us, we
will only want it more. If we feel free to be with somebody else,
then the initial excitement of that forbidden fruit is gone. Sign number six is that you don’t like living
life by society’s rules and tend to question everything. You are not one to follow social constructs
of what should and should not be. You often find yourself questioning these
in-positions made on us. Polyamory is instantly rejected by society
and almost seen as a threat to normal relationships and normal family life. However, you prefer to live and experience
for yourself before deciding your opinion on something as opposed to following everybody
else like a sheep. Sign number seven is that you trust your love
and connection with this person more than anything. You don’t think that seeing someone else could
possibly take away from your love and devotion to your partner. If anything, it might even strengthen your
appreciation for them. If the connection you have is authentic, then
it is really hard for that to just go away with the introduction of someone new. Sometimes we just enjoy someone new in our
lives but that does not mean we want them to ever replace our partner. And finally, sign number eight is that you
are aware that we can love more than one person and feel attracted to more than one person. If we learn to accept that one person cannot
fulfill every desire that we have, then we will immediately resent our partner less and
appreciate them more. If we decide to allow ourselves and our partners
to fulfill things we can’t through someone else, we are making them happy and that my
friend is love. Thank you for watching this video and hopefully
these signs helped you see if you’d potentially be open for a polyamorous relationship or
if you’re more happy in a monogamous one. Let us know if any of these signs relate to
you in the comments and any videos you might like to see next.

Michael Martin

100 Responses

  1. Happy Thursday everyone! How are you are doing? Psych2Go is on a mission to bring awareness to topics and issues that are less talked about. In this video, we cover polyamory, a term for being attracted or in a relationship with multiple people at once. Do you know someone like this? If so, consider sharing your experiences in the comment below. We'd love to hear your stories. As always, if you want to support us, you can do so by sharing our videos on your social media. Thank you!

  2. One of the biggest challenges in a 3 person polyamorous relationship. The pizza has 8 slices. Who only gets 2? Is it a rotational type thing or based on who was the biggest jerk that week.

  3. I honestly dont care if you are poly or not. I will love you and our partner(s) no matter what.

  4. ive been starting to believe that polyamory is for me in the past couple months,

    this video was posted on my birthday!

  5. I like a girl, and she is dating someone, but shes confirmed that I'm her second choice. Then I found out about Polyamory. If her girlfriend agrees, then I'm going to ask her on the anniversary of the day I met her. Wish me luck!!! 💖💛💙

  6. Im ace/aro and i have a friend who's in a polyamorous relationship and his two significant others are absolutely awesome to be around. We haven't seen each other since my friend graduated but im happy for him and support him and his significant others.

    For anyone who doesnt know what ace/aro means it means that i have no interest in copulation or romance with another being.

  7. “If we learn to accept that one person cannot fulfill every desire that we have..” 

    This is so sad. Guys what is wrong with you, no one should ever be accountable to fulfill the desires of others. Every individual is accountable for their OWN wellbeing. If you are unhappy as a single, you’ll probably (in the longterm) be unhappy in monogamous and polyamorous relationship. 

    Please admit that polyamorous people just enjoy to have sex with multiple partners, stop to overhype polyamorous relationships and praise them as the ultimate solution. Maybe you can also start displaying the disadvantages for these relationship construct such as less intimacy and exclusivity with your “prime partner”, more chaos and time investment to maintain relationships etc. 

    Monogamy contributed a lot to the overall (especially technological) progress. But thats just possible if you are not constantly looking for potential partners.

  8. this sounds analogous to putting four engines in the same car yes it'll give it a lot more horsepower but it'll also increase the chances of it breaking down significantly.

  9. I have been having poly relationships (of all types) for years, my partner have been all monogamous and most of them are ok with it. A tip: make sure that ALL the parties are ok with it.

  10. My fam and I filmed a YouTube video discussing Polyamory 😅 check it out https://youtu.be/9zF6HNgYkwA

  11. Honestly I’m crying alone in my bathroom because I think I’m going to lose everyone I love because this video is confirming something I think I always knew

  12. In Polyamourus and I have a girlfriend, but I also have a crush on my best friend, who is also a girl. I'm scared to tell my girlfriend that I have a crush on another girl, but an still in live with her, in fear of what she might at.

  13. This is so ignorant. If your poly. You are someone that wants to have sex and flirtatious possibly leading to sex conversations with every person you think is interesting. Thats a sex addict. Other then the sexual relationships with multiple people. You are a human. This lady talking is literally acting like nobody else has these feelings. And if you do, you're poly. What?? Why make it complicated amd act like your special? Seems to me that alot of poly people believe they are living the natural way of men and women. I dont think so at all. Of your doing this. No way all 3 people are gonna feel equally loved. There will be jealousy. Which happens because you're in a intimate relationship with someone or people that you dont trust. Little to no trust doesnt mean you cant try and make it work to where you can trust that person. But this situation creates these feelings and there isnt a way around that. I know alot of poly people and most of them go back to regular old husband and wife kids and all. And tell me they were never truly happy. Dont full yourself. If you havent met one person you want to spend life with, then date. That person will come along.

  14. Oh god, this is horrible.
    PLEASE don't use this to confirm or deny if your polyamorus, SERIOUSLY…

    All these "Signs", are mainly, signs that your not in a healthy relationship to begin with. "You get energized by other people" – A healthy relationship will HAVE plenty of friends. "You are worried about being honest about being attracted to others" — that's an honesty problem, not "go date others too" how does that even fix that issue?

    And really, REALLY "Are you up for a challenge", no that is NOT what fucking polyamory is for…

    You wanna know what a REAL sign of polyamory is? If you find that you don't identify well with the "I love one and only", and instead, feel as if you can/do love more than one equally. Or perhaps have always feel like you have to shove down feelings constantly when you are with someone.

    Being poly isn't "let's so how many people I can fit into my pants" or "I don't feel like settling down". Poly isn't an excuse to feel free while being able to staying in a bad relationship. Being poly – Means that you are able to love more than one person, with your full heart. Do you love your father any less, because you happen to love your mother? Does your bff no longer mater, because you have a Bf? No. That's not how it works.

    It's all about the ability to love multi people equally, where others may find they only love one. Both are fucking wonderful. As long as what is being spread around is love, and NOT neglect, both are damn beautiful and sacred. <3

  15. I’m in a polyamorous relationship and I love it! I love both of my significant Others so much! 💕polyamory is not for everyone, but I honestly prefer it over just having one significant other.

  16. I've never experienced jealousy
    I have a boyfriend and always tell him it's okay if he flirts with someone else, but just because I feel like sometimes I can't fullfil his needs (in terms of being in a relationship). I have even consider asking him to be open, but idk I am kinda scared he won't think the same, cuz he is very loyal and always tries to explain everything. He really loves me

  17. I resent my partner,he doesn’t give me the emotional connection that I crave,when I’m with him,I feel that the emotional connection is missing and want to look for it in another person.

  18. I’m a teen and I think I’m polyamerous… honestly I don’t really like 1 on 1 situations and I feel more comfortable in groups of 3. Maybe it’s just because I haven’t found that one person for me but I really enjoy the thought of being in a group of 3.

  19. Ty, im a believer but the "norm" is hard to be made out correctly. To someone lets say has only had monogamis relations before, love is love is love, be free and share it. Psych2gooooo

  20. I told my bf a couple years ago that I'm polyamorus and need an open relationship to feel free and fulfilled, as monogamous relationships have always made me feel trapped and owned. He said once we hit 3 months together and "get serious" I need to ditch "this crap". Ever since then the resentment has built and built and now that we're engaged and expecting it's even worse. He refuses couples therapy because "we don't need it". Needless to say, yet another monogamous relationship has failed for me.

  21. I am in a 6-year relationship with a shemale. Now I fell in love with another shemale. They want me to make a decision between one of them. But I can't I love them both.

  22. it would be hard to not play favorites, but i definitely would love to cuddle two people at once, and im fine with sharing!

  23. I’ve tried a polyamory relationship by dating two girls but it didn’t work because the two I was dating didn’t like each other and it ruined all of our relationship.
    I wanna be in polyamory relationship, but I need the right time to try it out properly.

  24. 🏳️‍🌈🏳️❤️🧡💛💚💙💜💝💕💖💘💓☮️✝️✡️🔯☸️☢️🕉☯️🕎☪️☮️

  25. My experience on polyamorous relationship:
    * Me, boy 1 and boy 2 were doing just fine
    * Boy 1 and boy 2 starts secretly fighting on my back for me
    * I discover the fight and end of relationship for both
    Lesson learned 👍

  26. All the people in the comment section are saying that it’s not for them and there’s me.. the sexually and romantically confused girl who doesn’t know her sexuality and if polyamorous at the age of 13. Help me

  27. This is completely a personal opinion, but this video is making it sound like people can just chose to be polysexual and polyamorous and that polyamorous relationships are just something you can decide to want so that you can be "more adventurous".

  28. Man, polyamory is ROUGH. The stigma against it, and even when your current partner is OK with it in theory they could still be uncomfortable being in one due to insecurity… it's hard to manage and sometimes feels like it's not worth it, but I just don't think I could feel complete with only one s/o, y'know?

  29. 1. Polyamory is narcissism
    2. Polyamory is sex addiction
    3. Polyamory is narcissism
    4. Polyamory is sex addiction
    5. Polyamory is narcissism
    6. Polyamory is sex addiction
    7. Polyamory is narcissism
    8. Polyamory is sex addiction

    If you fit these 8 criterias, polyamory is for you!

  30. Lol yup so that’s confirmed. Not like anything will result out of it tho. No one I’ve been w has ever agreed to being poly

  31. I can relate with every sign and to a great extent with the signs 6-8! I'm in a relationship since past 8 years and had recently discovered this term "polyamory" in my Psychology Master's program. I feel I'm able to identify myself as being a polyamorous and just want to articulate on how to reflect this aspect of my personality.
    Thank you so very much for this video! 🙏 I wish you come up with more videos on sexuality like this which would help me introspect and articulate my thoughts. Always love your content!! 💕

  32. This video say 83% of societies allow polygamy but guess what? I've never seen or hear a woman with two husbands other than India's mythological woman that has 5 husbands from Mahabharata story. It's always male that is allowed to do polygamy. Isn't it unfair?

  33. I've heard a lot of things about people's reasons for chosing monogamy like: I'm a love starved child so I need quiet a bit of it from my partner.

    And yet- I was bullied as a child. and when I say I was bullied I mean it went above and beyond the typical bullying expeience, much deeper. I wasn't a target of a small group of kids but nearly my entire school that was of age to cause problems. I wasn't A TARGET, I was THE target and some of the things they did were profoundly disturbed. At one point Two girls held my bestie who happened to be female down felt her up and tried to molest her basically BECAUSE She was my friend and to try to intimidate her into abandoning me.

    It was at that kind of level, And as far as dating in "Real life" was concerned well the girls I was interested in when my peer group started dating were largely status/reputation obsessed and basically would not even consider taking the risk of having all of that HELL come down on them if they were to agree to go out with me.

    so while I Was quiet bold and willing to approach girls in the real world and not very insecure they all knew if anyone was mine the whole school would harass my significant other so what this manifested into was Girls being one thing when were alone and and entirely something else when other class mates were around.

    NOBODY Was going to go out with me, At all. I went online.

    And "Why Polyamory?" Because Even ONE relationship was at one point something I thought I'd never have.

    how wrong I was.

  34. So… 1. Dream of dating two people. 2. I have, like, 4 crushes at the moment. 3. I question EVERYTHING. 4. I have a tendency to daydream about being in a love triangle.

  35. I have so much love to give. I never felt right in being monogamous. I am so glad my husband FINALLY gave me the okay. He is only having sex. I just enjoy variety, and it is good to explore other sides of my personality with others. I still am in love with my husband but I also really enjoy being with my boyfriend. I plan to add on a few girlfriends too.

  36. I'm in a relationship with 7 boys we all love each other so much and we get jealous if someone from "the outside" flirts with one of us, we're so protective of each other
    it's honestly an amazing relationship I love them so much and I could never imagine my life without them

  37. Even tho this is something that works for so many let’s be honest someone isn’t going to be getting the same level of attention as the other .. someone definitely will be the favorite and the other person will more than likely feel some type of way about it unless they aren’t emotionally invested to begin with … its human nature to be territorial so I believe this can totally work but only when one or both of the parties aren’t emotionally invested 🤷🏽‍♀️

  38. For 2 years I've been on the fence about this. Now I'm for sure it is sometime I'd be willing to explore only I feel like most of the population identifies as monogamy and wouldn't even consider me as a valid partner.

  39. to me it's already hard enough to find reciprocal love in one person, more than one seems almost impossible but i'm open minded i think if i had the opportunity i will not decline such a relationship.

  40. I feel like polyamory isn't it about finding love,romance,or a deep connection but finding different people/sources to take care of your every want and need..I said what I said!

  41. I thought I wanted to be polyamorous then I just realized I wanted more pussy not more relationships and emotional attachment. The swinger life was more my taste

  42. 2:26 it doesn't have to be the opposite sex u know my mom was in a poly relationship with another girl and my stepdad and it was not that my stepdad was with them and my mom and the girlfriend weren't intimate, all of them were intimate. Just saying this because you don't have to be with the opposite sex. I also have a friend who is poly, but she is only attracted to girls.

  43. I greatly want a poly relationship but I'm very insecure and i would most likely constantly feel like a burden or that my partners like each other more than me and will eventually drop me from their lives. So I'm afraid to be a part of one

  44. When with a poly bf they gotten jelouse. Even tho he had a bf and was With him more then me.

  45. Not say it wouldn’t necessarily work, because I have seen it done. But in the relationships, only one person can be allowed to take the dominant alpha masculine roll, and the every body else must take the submissive bata feminine roll. It doesn’t matter if you’re straight, gay, lesbian, bisexual, or any LGBTQ.

  46. My girlfriend and I just started a triad with our boyfriend today! I love her and I love him, have for a long time! Im so excited for this new experience!!!

  47. This made me cry. My polyamorous relationship makes me feel so alive. He meets my needs and I feel so free. Yes, it will drag out jealousy and insecurity but it shines a light on these issues so you and your partner can work through it TOGETHER ❤️ Thank you for the affirmation ❤️

  48. I'm very interested in Polygamy and I enjoyed reading Neil Strauss's book "The Truth". I understand it might have challenges and that finding other people may be difficult but I like the idea of experiencing other people and having someone to do different things with. I want to try either an open relationship or a polygamy relationship and not feel restricted by someone or feel too attached to someone that decides part ways.

  49. I'm not really sure whether you can love two different people or just one. Love is a difficult subject that I'm still confused of, considering how there are so many types and so many "symptoms" that vary person by person. However, as long as it's not a toxic, dangerous relationship, I guess it's fine?

    Personally though, I'm a really, very, extremely possessive person since I was a kid so, I don't think polyamory is for me. I'd feel conflicted if the person I like says they love someone else other than me. Their happiness matters greatly, but I don't know if I can keep a rational mind against the other person, honestly. It feels really unpleasant. But then again, I don't have experience with romance. I can't be too sure about it either.

  50. Uh

    When you cant marry multiple baes at once but you'd still go marry in a monogamous relationship but again you still would date different people but you obviously want to build your relationship with your first bae.

  51. I like this person, but every time I see them, I get mad. I'm a asexual but like, I think I'm getting mood swings every time I see them. (Help meeee.)

  52. Thank you. Thank you, thank you. cries Now I know I'm not wrong, broken or a cheater, I just have a different way of loving and that's okay.

  53. not sure why but this kicked my anxiety into high gear lol i just kept thinking about all the times iv been left for someone else and how bringing someone else into the relationship would just make that happen again

  54. Okay this was a bit hetronormative darlings, also ignoring the fact that being poly is most common in the lgbt scene

  55. What if I try and be in a throuple (with a long term couple) while remaining a conventional relationship with my boyfriend. Could that in anyway work? I know it’s a lot but it just kinda presented itself

  56. I started thinking of this when I had two crushes at the same time and I loved the idea of them being together but I also wanted to be with them see I don't know what it means I don't think I'm poly idk…

  57. this probably wouldn't work out for me mainly because I get jealous easily, but the idea of loving two people without having to choose only one and having both of their love in return sounds very nice.

  58. I'm afraid of getting judged. I don't want people to call me a whore or tell me my relationships aren't true love. Even though I'm only poly-curious and I've never been in a poly relationship before.

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